Jailhouse Rock
by macisgate
Summary: Sam, Teal'c, and Jonas decide to take Jack's advice and have a little fun. But things don't go quite according to plan! STORY COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

Jail House Rock  
  
Well, I've had this idea in the back of my mind for a while now. I hope you like it!  
  
Disclaimer: It breaks my heart every time I remember that I really don't own them.  
  
Season: With Jonas, so I guess season 6  
  
Spoilers: none  
  
* * *  
  
Ever so carefully, she picked up the miniscule wire with a pair of tweezers. Closer and closer she edged it to what she thought was its proper position on the piece of alien technology. Her hand trembled slightly, and with extra determination it stilled. Just a little bit farther and the laws of physics could be breached once more.  
  
"Hey, Carter! What ya doing?"  
  
Sam jumped.  
  
The tweezers clattered to the floor.  
  
The wire flying.  
  
She rubbed her forehead wearily.  
  
"Well, sir, I was preparing to . . ."  
  
He waved his hand to stop her.  
  
"All right. All right. I guess it's safe to assume you're not leaving for downtime."  
  
"I just really want to finish this, sir."  
  
"Carter, Carter, what am I going to do with you? This is no way to spend downtime! You're young. Go do something exciting. Take pictures."  
  
"Pictures, sir?"  
  
"For the sake of posterity!"  
  
Sam looked at him blankly.  
  
"Ah, never mind! You go ahead and waste away your week off. I, on the other hand, am going to spend seven blissful days ice fishing."  
  
Shaking his head at her, Jack left.  
  
Sam shook her head, then got down on all fours in search of her missing wire.  
  
"'You're young,' he says. 'I'm going fishing,' he says. Like spending seven days in the middle of nowhere makes him a social butterfly!"  
  
Sam stopped her mutterings as she caught a metallic glint out of the corner of her eye.  
  
"Ah ha! Got you."  
  
Once again, she grabbed her tweezers. With fierce determination she put it in its rightful place.  
  
Or maybe not.  
  
It sputtered.  
  
It crackled.  
  
It died.  
  
Sinking to her chair in frustration, Sam stared in defeat at the machine.  
  
"Maybe he's right," she muttered to the empty room.  
  
Picking up her phone, she hit the speed dial.  
  
"Jonas Quinn."  
  
"Jonas, go get Teal'c and meet me topside in twenty minutes. We're getting a life!"  
  
* * *  
  
Jonas and Teal'c waited at the entrance of the mountain for Sam.  
  
"So, Teal'c, you weren't going to do anything for downtime either?"  
  
"Indeed not. I had planned on performing Kelpentok, a week long ceremony of meditation."  
  
"Well, um, I'm sure that would have been very nice."  
  
"Indeed."  
  
"Hey, here comes Sam."  
  
"All right guys, let's go."  
  
They promptly followed her as she led them to her car. Sam grinned at them.  
  
"Just wait till the Colonel gets back. We'll have some stories to tell! He wants pictures? I'll give him pictures!"  
  
They all got in the car and moved to buckle up.  
  
Sam's hand stilled on her seatbelt.  
  
"Major Carter. Is there a problem?"  
  
"Well, I just realized. I don't know what to do."  
  
They sat in silence for a moment unsure of what to do next.  
  
Suddenly it occurred to Jonas.  
  
"You know, there is something I've been wanting to do for quite a while."  
  
* * *  
  
Jack whistled cheerfully as his truck quickly swallowed up the miles.  
  
His cabin. Such a beautiful place. Relaxing. Why the rest of the team couldn't appreciate the fine art of fishing, he'd never know.  
  
"It'd do them good," he said aloud to no one in particular.  
  
"They're all so young. Well, maybe not T, but Carter and Jonas. They need to learn to stop and smell the roses. Yes, that's just what they need. You know –"  
  
Ringing from his cell phone interrupted his one-way conversation.  
  
"O'Neill."  
  
"Oh, thank goodness! I was afraid you'd be out of range by now, sir!"  
  
"Carter? What are you talking about? What's going on?"  
  
* * *  
  
"Well, you see, sir, um well, Teal'c and Jonas and I were out. Just like you wanted us to," she glanced over uncertainly at Teal'c and Jonas. Jonas gave her a thumbs-up sign. That's right. Put some of the blame on him.  
  
"So, as we were doing what you asked us to do, we kind of ran into some problems, and uh, how should I say this. . ."  
  
A voice came from the desk beside her.  
  
"Lady, look, you only get five minutes. Make it fast."  
  
"Hey! How come she get's five minutes! You only let the rest of us have two!"  
  
"Spike, do I need to put you separate from the others?"  
  
"No," Spike said with a heavy sigh.  
  
"Sam, who was that?" Jack was getting worried.  
  
"Who was that, you ask sir? Well, I guess you would say he's Doug. . . the prison guard. Oh, and Spike, but he says he's innocent, and I believe him."  
  
Spike grinned at her.  
  
Sam smiled back but winced as she heard tires squealing.  
  
"Sir? You okay?"  
  
She hung up the phone and went back to the cell, reclaiming her seat beside Teal'c and Jonas, across from Spike, Snake, and Bill.  
  
"He's on his way."  
  
* * *  
  
Well, what do you think? Worth continuing or in serious need of revision? There will only be about two more chapters, but I wanted to break it up to keep it from being too long. School is cancelled due to snow, so I will have the next part up very shortly. Thanks so much for reading! Lots of love! 


	2. Chapter 2

Jail House Rock – Chapter 2  
  
Thank you so much for the reviews guys! Hope you like this next chapter!  
  
* * *  
  
What in heaven's name had they gotten themselves into, Jack wondered for the millionth time as he turned his truck around for the return trip. It would take him three hours to get back.  
  
"This had better be good."  
  
* * *  
  
"Thanks, Doug," Sam smiled at the prison guard as he handed around some coffee.  
  
She leaned back against the wall as she took a sip and sighed in relief.  
  
"Hey, lady," Snake spoke up from the other side of the cell. "What you do to get in here anyway?"  
  
Sam looked over at Teal'c and Jonas. Jonas couldn't help but grin. Teal'c's eyes lit up at the memory.  
  
*Oh, why not,* Sam couldn't help but smile to herself.  
  
"Well, you see, we were trying to teach Jonas here how to drive."  
  
If it was possible, Jonas' grin got even bigger.  
  
"You don't know how to drive?" Spike asked incredulously.  
  
"Man, I was hotwiring cars since I was 14!" Bill exclaimed.  
  
"I was doing really good too. Wasn't I, Teal'c?"  
  
"Indeed."  
  
Doug chuckled from his corner.  
  
"Well, I don't think that farmer appreciated you holding Driver's Ed. in his field."  
  
"Oh come on," Sam jumped in. "It's the middle of winter. It's not like he could grow anything."  
  
"Trespassing's trespassing. Besides, your friend here doesn't even have a beginner's permit."  
  
They shrugged, not really pleased with his logic.  
  
"I suppose my pop-a-wheelies and doughnuts probably worried him," Jonas finally decided.  
  
The others nodded.  
  
"Maybe."  
  
Jonas still couldn't help but grin at the memory.  
  
A sigh sounded from the corner. Bill sat with his arms resting on his thighs.  
  
"I can still remember my first car," he sighed. "She was a beauty. Candyapple red. Sparkling chrome finish. Leather interior. Too bad the owner had to get so upset."  
  
Spike reached over and gave the big guy a pat on the shoulder.  
  
"I mean, he had three other cars!"  
  
Sam and the others nodded in support.  
  
"That must have been really hard for you."  
  
* * *  
  
The time ticked slowly by. Snake was now telling them his tale of lost love. Even Doug had pulled his chair closer to the cell to hear better.  
  
"She didn't even tell me face to face. Just left a 'Dear Snake' letter."  
  
"How awful!"  
  
"That's terrible."  
  
"Aw, who am I kidding. He was good looking, rich, sophisticated. What would she have wanted with an old coot like me."  
  
"Hey, don't say that!" Sam crossed over and sat beside him, putting her arm around his shoulders. "You are a wonderful, kind-hearted person. If Maxine couldn't appreciate that, then I say good riddance to her. You deserve better!"  
  
"Yeah," they all agreed.  
  
Snake took a deep breath and nodded his head.  
  
"Thanks guys, that means a lot."  
  
Suddenly the door burst open, letting in a burst of cold air.  
  
"Colonel! You made it!"  
  
"O'Neill, it is most good to see you."  
  
Doug got up from his chair and straightened up his shirt, a little embarrassed at his lapse of professionalism.  
  
"Can I help you, sir?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm here to break these guys out of jail. What's the bail?"  
  
"Oh well, there was no real harm done. They won't be eligible to drive for quite some time, but I think they've learned their lesson."  
  
They gave him appreciative smiles.  
  
"Thanks Doug."  
  
"Yeah, thanks."  
  
* * *  
  
It was after midnight when they finally squeezed into Jack's truck.  
  
"Thanks for coming to get us, sir."  
  
"About that. Why didn't you just call Hammond? He could have had you out of there in less than an hour."  
  
"Um, we were kind of hoping he wouldn't have to find out about this."  
  
"It's a little embarrassing, sir."  
  
"I believe General Hammond would be most displeased."  
  
"Yeah, well, I don't think when he gave you all downtime he had trespassing, pop-a-wheelies, driving without a license, and Snake, Spike, and Butch in mind."  
  
"Actually, that was Bill, sir, and they were all very nice."  
  
"I'm sure. Look, all right, we won't tell the General. But after this, when you get the urge to do something crazy, just count to ten and go play a board game. Understood?"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"Very well, O'Neill."  
  
"Good. Now let's go fishing!"  
  
A collective groan.  
  
* * *  
  
Meanwhile, back at the jailhouse.  
  
"Those were real nice, decent folk."  
  
"Yeah. I'm sure going to miss them."  
  
"Hey, Doug! You got anymore of that coffee?"  
  
"You know what fellas?" Doug decided. "I think we've all had a really good self-reflecting time. Why don't we call it an evening? You're all free to go."  
  
"Thanks, Doug!"  
  
"Yeah, thanks buddy!"  
  
"What a great guy."  
  
* * *  
  
Two hours had passed.  
  
"Are we almost there yet?"  
  
"Oh, about an hour and a half left to go."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Hey, can I drive?"  
  
"NO!"  
  
* * *  
  
Just one more chapter to go, everyone! How are you liking it? Not as funny as I'd wanted, but I hope you enjoyed anyway! The next chapter will probably go up in a few hours. Oh, and I'm watching in syndication, so I just saw "Shadows and Mirrors" last week where Jonas is envying Teal'c for being able to drive. If he learned in a later episode, I didn't realize. Hope that's okay! Hey, maybe I should write one about Teal'c's driving lessons. . . Don't you just love snow days? 


	3. Chapter 3

Jailhouse Rock – Chapter 3  
  
Hey everyone! Here's the last chapter. Thank you so much for your reviews. You are such great people! I realized with spell check that I was spelling "jailhouse" wrong, so I had to fix the title. Hope you enjoy this next chapter!  
  
* * *  
  
Sam walked through her house one last time, making sure all the lights were turned off and electrical appliances unplugged. She watered her plants and shut a couple doors as she remembered the past week. They had indeed gone fishing. She had to admit it was a lot of fun. She'd even caught two fish. The Colonel had been so proud. Sam grinned as a car horn sounded and a shout reached her ears.  
  
"Carter, let's go!"  
  
Sam made her way downstairs and grabbed her coat, laptop, and purse. Yes, she'd had her license suspended. The Colonel had graciously offered to drive everyone in to work today.  
  
She opened the door.  
  
"Hey, Colonel, I'm all set. Just let me grab the mail from the mailbox."  
  
As they settled into his truck, Sam handed two of the envelopes she'd been holding to Teal'c and Jonas.  
  
"These are for you."  
  
Jack was curious but didn't bother asking as they made their way to Cheyenne Mountain.  
  
* * *  
  
Jack fiddled with the pen on his desk. What was the use of downtime if all you had to look forward to was more paperwork when you got back?  
  
He shuffled some of the papers around when an envelope caught his attention. It looked like one of the letters Sam had given Teal'c and Jonas.  
  
He picked it up for closer examination.  
  
"For Posterity," he read aloud the hand-written not on the envelope. "Sam."  
  
Not willing to waste time, he tore it open and pulled out what was inside.  
  
A mug shot.  
  
He smiled at the grinning face behind the row of numbers.  
  
"Samantha Carter, what am I going to do with you?"  
  
* * *  
  
THE END!  
  
Maybe now I will get some work done! I sincerely hope you liked this story! I'm in such a writing mood today. If you've got snow like I do, stay safe. No pop-a-wheelies in the fields of unsuspecting farmers =D Best wishes and lots of love to you all!  
  
macisgate 


End file.
